Saturday, June 21, 2008

When is it the right time for THE talk?

True story, not my own:

So, last night my friend and her kids were watching Meerkat Manor on animal planet and it seems the Meer's were getting it on doing it getting jiggy mating. My friend tells me that her 14 year old was saying, "Oh my gosh" and laughing. Her 9 year old boys didn't understand what was funny. (I have been telling her it is TIME to let the boys in on this little secret.) Today whilst on the way to baseball they are having a conversation in the car with their dad about why anyone would name their son "Taylor" since that is a girl's name. One of the boys says, "I bet the baby was born and they named it Taylor and then later found out that it was a boy and it was too late." Their dad said, "You are kidding right? You know that they can tell right away if it is a boy or a girl. (here's where the teachable moment, in my opinion goes down the drain) Boys have a penis and...girls don't." Many of you might see that as perfectly acceptable use of the teachable moment. My comment was, "You didn't even say, vulva or vagina or name it AT all? You called it "don't"? Like boys have this thing called a penis and girls...well, they just don't?"

Fast forward-->

Boy: "Oh come on baby."
Girl: "Don't."
Boy: "Yep, that's what I love to hear."
Girl: "I said don't"
Boy: "Oh I heard you, my dad told me all about don't. I know a lot, I watched the Meerkats go at it."

Remember, internets, teaching moments are EVERYWHERE, this sex talk thing doesn't have to be all weird and embarrassing. The way you handle this conversation (or lack of it) really does effect the attitudes that your children will carry with them about sex. Why have we allowed society to teach that sex is dirty and wrong, but that you should save it for the one you love?

How did you find out about the birds and the bees? What age do you think is the best age to have the talk with your children?


  1. Hey internets- listen to this gal-she knows of what she speaks! She makes a lot of money on this sex thing AND gives good advice!

    I remember a little of sex ed in school, not much. And I don't remember that my parents said much either. We've been pretty frank with HG and I've had to have some conversations about "this leads to that". Luckily she has taken a purity vow. I still talk to her about stuff though, and she has known the parts since before HB1 was born-she changed diapers for pete's sake!. We also had to explain how the baby got there. So far for my boys we are trying to use the teachable moments as they come- dishing it out in chunks that they can handle for their age.

  2. There are a dozen possible things running through my head, but our relationship is new and fragile, so I won't tell you now what a vulgar don't I am.

  3. Oh, and I'm still waiting for my birds & bees discussion. I've been kinda winging it.

  4. Headless- thanks for the props. I had the talk with buddy boy at age 8 and well miss thing is all about getting the barbies undressed.

    Amy- there's nothing you could say that would harm our new relationship, I have heard it all and I'm up for a good laugh...go ahead show us what kind of a don't you are!
    **By the looks of your darling daughter it seems you may not have needed the talk anyway! ;)

  5. Ok, so I've had a couple posts that I've been a little over the top with...though they don't quite answer your question completely, I would have to say keep doing what you're doing and take EVERY single time as a teaching moment....

    Here's one (wish I knew how to make the link instead):

    and: one about drugs...

    I am over the top. AAAAH!!! :) Pray for me!