Winter sports with a Coach from California

So, Miss Thing started "spring" soccer.  Even though we are March it really can't be considered Spring yet with all the snowfall we are "hopefully" still going to get.  Well, her coach just moved to Colorado from San Diego...she thinks it's real cold here.  I guess compared to San Diego it is cold here, but , um it is Colorado and this is one of the most mild winters we've had in a long time!  So, when it comes time to practice the outdoor sport of soccer, it might be a bit nippy or even a little COLD.  The first game is this Saturday, but seeing as practice on Monday was cut short because it was cold (and I will grant her that one, it was cold and Miss Thing was in shorts).  Come today, Wednesday, sunny day, nip in the air, nip, not nipples,  I get a phone call that practice is canceled because "it is cold out and the girls were crabby on Monday when it was cold." 

 

cold vs warm

I started off on a really good foot with Coach Warm Weather when I was trying to make conversation with her before practice started.  She was counting the girls and wondering who she was missing.  I said, "Miss Thing said there was a girl at last practice who didn't really want to play, is she here yet?"  "Yes, she's here, that would be MY daughter."  So, mom doesn't want to play soccer because it is too cold and her daughter doesn't want to play soccer because she prefers dance and gymnastics.  Should be an interesting season.

 I hope we don't have to deal with this all season---->

photo courtesy of google

pouty vs  sassy

Good news it is supposed to be 56 degrees on Saturday!  That's a nice warm day for soccer and even some mid-field gymnastics!

It was scarier from the ground I ASSURE you!

This is how we spent our Labor Day 2008.  Me with labored breathing on the ground and my kids and husband climbing 10 stories in the air and then spinning around on an ariel ladder.  I still feel nauseated just thinking about it!

They definitely trust their daddy...you won't see ME climbing that ladder!

I took this picture then had to turn away.

Took this picture then felt really sick in my stomach.  Would I be a nervous nelly if I told you I got home and, shall we say...I needed a few minutes alone in the bathroom with a few tums for good measure.

Is it REALLY necessary to take the hands OFF the ladder!!??

Odds and Ends + Blog Roll Stroll

Wow you all are up EARLY today! It is 9am and already 4 of you (I love you who ever you are!) have come by already today to check on little ol' me and my blog. Come BACK, I'm here now with something to say!

First- if you have prayer in your life would you please send some to my brother and his in-laws? They are going to have some very rough and sad days before them and could use any and all prayers and positive thoughts to get them through this time. Thank you.

So, I have fallen into the trap of having all sorts of great things rolling around in my head, but I never make the time to sit down and put them here. Remember how I started this blog because I have the WORST memory known to man? Anyone who knows me in TRW can attest to the fact that I really should have some sort of medication or exam or something cause it's getting outta control. Thank you Lord for the T-Mobile Wing that has a little alarm that reminds me of things like, oh, what time school starts and lets out. Yes, I admit it, I have forgotten the little darlings a time or two expecially on that early release day that happens once a freakin WEEK. But I've already told you my thoughts on the teachers and their days off. It also tells me about appointments and I can even put in there a little reminder alarm for when it is time to sit down and blog, or better yet, when it is time to STOP blogging go get the kids from school.

So, let me catch you up real quick like on what is going on over here.
*Miss thing is signed up for soccer.  Her first organized sport and she is all about the uniform.  I tell you she has had that thing on daily since we got it and professed herself "an official soccer player."  I didn't have the heart to tell her that I think she might have to actually touch a soccer ball with her foot first in order to be official.  I swear, if I just spent all that money on soccer, uniform, shin guards and cleats and she gets out there and hates soccer I am going to freak out!
*Buddy Boy started tackle football and he really seems to be enjoying rattling his brain around.  His first game is tomorrow and I'll have to report back as to his injuries how I feel about it.
*School Started!!!  Hallelujah!!!  Both kids got great teachers and for the first time in 7 years I don't have a sick pit in my stomach about sending Buddy Boy to school.  I have a post coming up about peanut allergies and the reality that we live with.  Even if you don't have children with food allergies, chances are VERY HIGH and getting higher that your child is or will be in class with one.  OR  God.forbid develop one themselves.

I was treated yesterday to a mani/pedi/brow shaping by my dear friend Amy.  Thanks Amy!  I love you and WOW, if any of you need a great Realtor, go check her out and make sure to tell her I sent ya, she pays out nicely treats anyone who refers her very nicely is an EXCELLENT realtor!  This site is totally 2.0 and I LOVE IT!!!  She has sold TWO of my friends' homes in the past 5 months....uh hello...in.this.market.  She has a 100% success rate with people I refer to her, so there you have it!  Oh and my hands and my toes look oh so cute and that bush that was once my brows is now a darling little arch above my eye.  Come on by and check me out.  oh, but not until this afternoon when I will have dealt with that strip of white that stopped being a skunk a week ago and started being just a haggard old woman who for goodness sake would you just take care of yourself already?  Bless you gals who are local and never said anything to my face.  You can now stop whispering about how I really have aged over the summer and get back to gossiping about that hussie.or the cabins and the threat of terrorists.or who pitched a bitch to get her child moved out of a perfectly good classroom.or who is coming to bible study and who isn't.and who is in minis and who is in minors. and who is hitting on whom and should know better.  Ahhh, I feel better.

Still with me?  love.you  I have the most exciting news!  My funniest pal in the WORLD has joined us in the blogosphere.  She is clearly doing a little nesting as she is 36 weeks pregnanto and is starting a blog.  Helloooo I told you  MONTHS ago how fun it would be to start a blog and you are doing this now BECAUSE??? you have nothing better to do with your time?  How about NAP? Watch mindless TV? EAT since soon enough those brats will be taking the food out of your mouth?  Oh, you're already doing all that?  Well, ok, then WELCOME to the BLOGGERHOOD!  Go check her out, she truly is a hoot and won't it be fun to watch her go through the last weeks of her pregancy and into motherhood for the second time with a 14 month old and a newborn?  Can you say better her than me YEEHAW?

Now for the blog roll stroll for this week.  Would you all stop writing such great stuff?  I can't keep up!

• This one cracked me up, it's a cool little trick for making more bubbles out of your bubble bath.
• This girl Mindi is going to piss me off she's all here's a simple way to use coupons. I can't figure it out to save my soul, but I'm going to give it a try, she seems nice enough, but if it doesn't work THEN I'll be pissed!
• I LOVE THIS SITE, it inspires me to WANT with a burning desire to be all handy and crafty, but this mud room makeover made me drool over how freakin' simple she made it seem.  Seriously, too many great things over there and I am officially her #1 jealous wanna-be fan.  If I ever do a craft inspired by her or anyone for that matter, I will be sure to alert the press!  Be sure to leave me a comment to thank me for this killer hook up into the world of "If only I were that awesomeness".
• It's Fall, are you ready for What's Hot, What's Pop and What's too Much? me neither
• Do you have your Home Management Notebook ready to go?  Really? No?  What are you waiting for? OK, me neither.
• This one will take you DAYS to get through, but the links are invaluable to anyone just getting started in blogging!  Seriously, bookmark this one fo sho!
• This one is about making money from your blog (don't we all wish)  But really, I read something yesterday that said the ads on a blog are like a tip jar.  If you read something you like, something that made you laugh, cry or think GO.AHEAD.CLICK.THE.AD.  Just like comments are the currency of the blogosphere, giving a couple clicks to the ads on a blog you have enjoyed...a nice gesture and howdoyoudo!  It's ok, I'm not looking, you can go ahead and click ;)

So, now it's 10am...that took me a long ass time!  Show me the love people and comment below!  :)

Growth Plate Zen

Miss Thing is on the mend. Here she is paying tribute to her Zen trampoline Master, BHJ. (killer blog if you haven't been to The Wind in Your Vagina, go ahead, I'll wait) Remember the trampoline "incident" where it was confirmed that I am the worst mom ever? She is now an enlightened student of Black Hockey Jesus and will be doing back flips on the trampoline as soon as the dirty, smelly boot comes off. She wants us to keep it to "play" with. Interesting...she has done much whining and complaining about wearing it, but views it as a fun play thing for the future. If I stink it is because I have been sweating my ass off trying to mop up the black skid marks she's been leaving on the wood floor. Tear it up little girl, I'm not wasting another moment of my life mopping that floor until the boot is history. Don't get too close to the boot either, it has a funk of it's own. Check back for the post of Miss Thing doing her BHJ back flip.

Twisted by Grace

I promised to post about Miss Things Trauma Center visit. I have to first say that I now realize that my mom is not reading my blog...no phone call wanting to know what happened. Now that I think about it, I now know that NONE of my family is reading my blog.

I don't know if that is good or bad news?! Internets, you understand. There are times you just want to write something that you know mom wouldn't approve of. Why is it that at 39 years I still check myself and don't want to disappoint my mom? I digress...but mom, when and if you ever come back to my blog again could you post for me and the internets how to program a child with an inner "Uh, oh I better not say, do, think that or my mom might be disappointed" chip? I definitely want my kids growing up with this inner conflict voice.

So, little did I know that Miss Thing has so much in common with Dooce and Headless Mom. Seems Dooce missed a back flip on the trampoline and Headless Mom twisted her ankle and is busy reading blogs with her foot elevated and iced. Let's do the math (something that hasn't been done in this house ALL summer!)

Dooce + Headless Mom= Miss Thing

She was jumping on the trampoline (I can see the eye rolls and hear the "you suck as a parent" undertones now) with some older girls and came down on it wrong. It was the death scream that tipped me off and the fact that I could see from.the.door the SWOLLEN and BRUISED ankle already. Mr. Man had just driven away for some batting cage fun...figures, where is a Paramedic when you need one? His expert opinion was to elevate and ice (this over the phone in hopes that he could still make it to the batting cages). Mommy intuition told me he should shove the bat up his ass come home and take a look. "We" made the executive decision to head over the the trauma center.

We came home with this:

This is NOT how her face looked a mere 2 hours earlier. Note, the setting...baseball (hence the batting cages).

5 simple steps to tooth extraction!

It happened AGAIN! This time with the OTHER front tooth. I thought I was ready, but, no. The pictures tell it all!

This is sheer terror at the thought of ME pulling that tooth out.

( This is after failed attempt #2)

So, we make a phone call to the neighborhood tooth pulling expert who tells us to come on over as HER mom (the original tooth pulling expert is here visiting and is available for a 9pm tooth extraction)

Do you see the sheer relief on Miss Thing's face?

It's as if she senses she is in the presence of a competent tooth extractionist.

STEP 1: Fold up some paper towel into strips and have child hold it tight.

Step 2: (take before picture) Get dental floss and toothpick ready.

Make a loop with the floss, then put the ends of the floss through the loop making a little lasso for the loose tooth. Use the toothpick to gently push the floss up to the gum line, pull the lasso tight.

Step 3: Tell child you are going to count 1-2 and then you want the child to say "go" and pull straight down (if it is a top tooth) and up or out if it is a bottom tooth.

Step 4: Have child bite on the paper towel (this stops the bleeding REALLY fast)

Step 5: Take after picture and thank the tooth pulling guru for her time!

A Sassy New Do

Time for a change. Or time for mommy to not have to hear you whining about getting your hair combed.

This picture of the hairy, pink Elephant ass made J and I crack up. Everyone needs a friend who thinks dumb things are funny. We even laughed about it again last night, a full 24 hours post hairy elephant ass. Now THAT is a friend! Guess what, she'll laugh again when she sees this picture, then she'll call me laughing and we'll laugh AGAIN. Scarey, I know.

The end result is darling! She loves it and as much as I was worried about what her daddy would say, he loves it too.

The First Day of Summer

Miss Thing and I went for a walk this morning and she did something that touched my heart. These days she does more to touch my buttons than my heart so I literally had to stop and watch. As I was walking and she was scootering I noticed that she kept stopping and then would catch up. I finally figured out what she was doing. She was picking up every Roley Poley she found and was gently putting them back in the grass. She was worried they might get run over or stepped on. She apparently was not worried about the amount of bodily harm she was doing to them by pinching them in her fingers or the fact that she might have just added another day to their travels by putting them on the wrong side. It was done with love and caring and all I can hope is that she hangs on to some of that as she grows up.